JDP

The Ministry of Live Burials

Transcultural Dialogues

By: Hakim Hazik 

Citizen: I must be going blind doctor. Everybody tells me that the society has changed since 18th of February. Dictatorship has been banished for ever from the Land of the Pure. The will of the people reigns supreme. I can not see any difference doctor. Please help.  

Dr BA: Have you seen an eye specialist? 

Citizen: I have seen a doctor, who assures me that he did not buy his degree from a fake university through a correspondence course. He tells me that I have a 20/20 vision.  

Dr BA: Ah, there is where you have gone wrong. You need a 55/55 vision like your government. That is the number of ministers we have appointed, to serve democracy and to serve our people.  

Citizen: Fifty five ministers doctor ji? But the previous government had more. I still can not see the difference.  

Dr BA: The difference is in the quality of manpower. Take the Ministry of Live Burials, headed by Minister Poison. Now this fine minister has served democracy in his constituency like no one else, before or since. He promotes shooting those people, especially females, who harbour anti democratic designs, burying them in shallow graves and ploughing them over with the help of locally manufactured tractors, so as to minimise any environmental damage, and to promote local industry. We take our civic responsibilities seriously.   

Citizen: Burying women alive will promote democracy doctor ji? 

Dr BA: Only those women who nurture anti democratic feelings. You should see our Ministry of Karo Kari. No, no, don’t jump to conclusions. The Ministry of Karo Kari has nothing to do with chicken curry. This ministry is headed by Minister One Thousand Excuses. He is the Cambridge educated suave minister who sold into slavery 5 girls to promote democracy into his largely conservative community.  He was brought to the thoroughly disgraced former chief justice in handcuffs where he gave him the dodge and escaped the police custody exhibiting the pizzazz and flare; we admire so much and need so much in our new democracy.  

Citizen: The economy is in dire straits doctor ji. This is what seems to be different from the previous dictatorial government.  

Dr BA: This is the result of the global economic crisis. It is important that patriotic Pakistanis should bring their money back from abroad, so that we can confiscate it to serve the nation. I can assure you that the President will bank this money under his own name in offshore holding companies and invest in real estate abroad, to keep the international banking system from collapsing. Our government could make another gift of 60 million dollars to city government of Geneva to show our solidarity in these difficult times.  

Citizen: Thank you minister. I can see things clearly now. I am cured. Hallelujah.                                                                                       

                         

Dr Babar Awan's fake degree 

Live burials

Senator Zehri statement on live buruials 

Vani case             

More articles by Hakim Hazik

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Comments

Uzma Argentina, on 11/22/2008 8:12:54 AM Said:

Uzma

It is sad to know that senator Baber Awan was swindled by a fake university. We wish better luck for other corresponding students. However the point is that no matter how qualified people in Pakistan are to speak on the matters of Sharia, most suffer from a basic existentialist confusion which disqualifies them to talk on this subject. Consider the criticism that is coming from the pious ones on the issue of amendments in divorce laws that have been recommended by the IIC of Pakistan. The recommended amendments in divorce laws reflect the most progressive thinking that we have seen by IIC in a long time. And it is much needed. Millions of  women suffer because of the threat of divorce that hangs over them form the day they get married due to possible misuse of a verbal divorce option by their husbands and in-laws. The true spirit of divorce laws in Islam is to make divorce easy but not to the extent that it can be used as a weapon by either spouse. However, the form is in force and the spirit absent from the existing laws. Similarly, talk to the clerics (any cleric) about abolition of capital punishment and blasphemy laws; most will froth at the mouth. The emphasis is on preservation of Sharia as ‘we’ understand it and not on relieving human misery and achieving change and progress in human condition as was the desire of all prophets and their real legacy. Thus ignorance abetted by an undue concern for piety and a strait jacketed wisdom remain some of the greatest impediments to change. Now there is an opportunity to dispel the existential fog; as we can address our young people today as never before and break myths and perceptions that keep us wedded to the past as a people. The contention is that you target selected bigots and not all of them, or the thinking that they subscribe to, which is the common thread that binds many people in Pakistan. Can we launch a frontal attack on bigotry and ignorance regardless of which side of the political divide it comes from?

Ustadji United Kingdom, on 11/28/2008 2:12:24 AM Said:

Ustadji

"It is sad to know that senator Baber Awan was swindled by a fake university." What does that mean????/ in the same context then you can say amir liaqat as well...but ARE THEY SO INNOCENT OR WERE THEY JUST LOOKING FOR A SELL AWAY TITLE??

uzma Algeria, on 12/2/2008 6:48:16 AM Said:

uzma

From the attached news story published in ‘The News’ it appears that he was defrauded like ‘innumerable’ other students. If you believe that he bought the degree knowing that the university was fraudulent, then the onus of proof is on you. However this is not the main point of my comment. The point is that there is a skewed thinking process behind crimes such as honor killing that needs to be exposed and attacked. Unless we do that, there is no point in blaming the ruling party selectively. The whole society is to blame for continuation of myths rooted in the past, more so the journalists, because the power to change perceptions is in their hands.

Hakim United Kingdom, on 12/15/2008 3:13:13 PM Said:

Hakim

There should not be a council of Islamic ideology, unless there is council each for Hindu, Christian, Buddhist, Sikh and Parsi ideology. There should be a parliamentary advisory committee for Muslim personal law. All other communities should have the same right to have a personal law.
The divorce law suggested by one member of the IIC was actually quite good and fair. The top Maulvi of the IIC has resigned because he disagrees.
It should be up to the parliament to do the law making.

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uggs cheap , on 12/12/2009 12:33:59 AM Said:

uggs cheap

The comments by you are the most idiotic and childish that i ve ever seen. come on and grow up, dont take Pakistanis too light!!!! this is 4 you and the other idiots like you.

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