By: Mudassar Bashir

Gul Begum was better known as 'Rani Gul Begum'. She was one of the courtesans from Amritsar. Maharaja Ranjit Singh was quite open about his relationships with courtesans throughout his life. A courtesan called Moraan was his favorite for a very long time during his reign over Lahore. She used to be known as 'Rani Moraan' in the court and city. One can still see a few buildings built by her in Punjab including a mosque in Papar Mundi Lahore. After her death, Moraan was buried next to Hazrat Tahir Bandagi in the Miani Sahib Graveyard. More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

Major General Asim Saleem Bajwa, DG ISPR, when talking to this correspondent has outlined the new paradigm of War and Peace that has been developed in the Rawalpindi Golf Club after a game of 19 holes and an excellent serving of ox tail soup to round off a great day at the links. More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

Glad tidings to the faithful. Father Christmas is here. He wears white and not red and brings goodies for the believers wrapped up in khaki and not tinsel. Very soon he will kiss the Field Marshal,  under the branch of mistletoe and with the waving of the silver topped cane with the regimental monogram, the two will be joined in holy matrimony to love and to cherish in sickness and in health, in war and in peace,  during marshal law and civilian rule, so help them God. More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

Press Statement:

We are winning this war. So far we have killed 9 enemies of Islam and CIA agents. If the CIA, does not back down, we will kill all our health care workers and infect all our children with polio. That will show them. More...

The Quaid Ispeaks

Hakim Hazik

Dear Peepil of the Gireat Port City, the Chief of the New Iscott Land Yard came far tea to the Edgware aafice. Yours tiruly co-operated fully. We had a nice, one to one, about impartant pirablems facing the nation. (Bilighty). I shared with him my extensive experience in how to police a major city, (Chicago). I was emotionally overcome reminiscing the fond memories of the late father of the nation (Al Capone). More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazi

The Almighty has spoken. Never since the beginning of the universe has He spoken in such clear terms. He called all the angels and the archangels, secretaries and deputy secretaries, qasids and naib qasids and said that the dam be built. All should bow in submission to this Being created out of mud, the vicegerent of the Almighty and given supremacy over all Creation. Those who refuse and rebel will fall from favour and be driven from power, as the Almighty giveth power and it is his to take away. More...

Letter from Brother Abdullah

Hakim Hazik

Praise be to Allah who has allowed us to bulldoze all signs of idolatry including the houses of Sahaba and the graves of the Baqee Cemetery to make room for the amenities of a pious and modern life, including Dior^TM and Nina Ricci^TM. Salutations to the Creator who has blessed us with asphalt which is more powerful than sand and with which we can build large squares and piazzas, ideal for the public execution of Bangladeshi infidels and Sudanese witches, to the blessed recitation of Qari Al-Ghamdi. More...

Tuzk e Jahangiri

Hakim Hazik

Shriek Chairman is shrieking with laughter. Tears are rolling down his cheeks. Field Marshal has come to sit on the carpet with his cap in the hand and his brather has come on his NATO tanker with ‘maan ki dua’ painted on its behind with a photu of Yoob Khan. More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

Indictment

General David Howell Petreaus,

You are accused of having an unlawful affair in violation of the terms of your employment, and the prestige of your office. You are accused of giving unprecedented access to the General Atomics MQ 1 Predator, also known as Paula Broadwell. You are accused of having in your annex two Libyan prisoners and an unauthorized piece of dangerous armament called Gill Kelly. Because of these indiscretions, your private parts, national security  and the world peace has been put at risk. More...

Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

All the state institution should stay within their limits. These limits are decided by the supreme commander of the armed forces and the master of the universe, the living avatar of God on earth, the emir of the faithful, chief of the army staff, Yours Truly. More...