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My Istruggle

The Quaid Ispeaks


By: Hakim Hazik

Peepil of Kiranchi unite. You have nothing but your necks to lose. We have come far. The journey that we istarted in the pharmacy department, has culminated in the gornamint of United taking over the gireat Port City.

When I arrived in Chicago, it was difficult to get a cab license. But I persevered. Chicago had a gireat past. Many a revolutionary has lived here. I was particoolaarly impressed by Al Capone and by his midil cilass methods. He liberated the gireat city firam the ciluthces af the industrial barons. In the same way that we are going to liberate the gireat Port City and the gireat Islamic Republic firam the ciluthces af the feudal land lards. In this nobil effort, the nobil armed forces are with us. We demonstirated our sincerity of purpose on 12th May, 2007 just as Al Capone had expiressed his selfless devotion in the St Valentine’s day massacre.

The diveeyun af India was a gireat bilunder. It caused enarmours bilood shed. We are tirying to heal the old wounds. We must have good relations with India. We must live side by side in peace. We have shown the way. We have made Kiranchi a great haven af peace and pirasperity. All communities live side by side like birathers and sisters. All those ambulance derivers and rickshaw derivers and shoe shine boys who get shot, are enemy agents. They oppose peace. They are working for enemies af peepil, such as Jamaat e Islami.

We do not believe in war. We believe in peace. Whoever opposes our midil cilass revolution will rest in eternal peace.

Look what Naseerullah Babar did. He carried out the islaughter af the innocents. At the same time he created the monster af Taliban who are ispreading like cancer in this land. Mutahidda is the only party which has istood up to Taliban. We have istood up against the land girabbing mafia. We have made it very cilear to them, that we will do all the girabbing in the gireat Port City. The only thing you are allowed to girab is the hem af the gireat leader when he returns in glory firam his istay abrad.

London has a lot to offer to a midil cilass revolutionary with a viyun. Taxi cabs are world cilass. There are about 25 gangs, promoting demociracy, firam Tower Hamlets to Peckham. Excellent tiraining is available in the use of assault knives and other means af public service. Public enemies such as Jean Charles de Menezes are dealt with effectively and firmly. Much as Mutahidda has dealt with the unauthorised arrivals in the gireat Port City, who are a dirain on the resources of the city and tend promote a non midil cilass culture.

I have acquired a nice piraperty in Mill Hill. The next time you are iround, please dirap by. I can cook you some excellent haleem and teach you how to pronounce ‘Quaid e Tehreek’ in a piraper midil cilass way, with a piraper Q. I can also teach you how to diraw and shoot, in a piraper Taxi Deriver fashion.

You talkin’ to me?

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