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See No Evil

Extraordinary Rendition

By: Hakim Hazik

Bon jour Ada Sarko Zee. This is votre brotheur from Islamabad. Mon regards to Adi Carla, the Sultana of Brunei.

Mon ada, beaucoup de water has flown into the Arabian Sea and over the hulls of Agosta submarines depuis 1994. Votre brotheur has seen the inside of Bastille, le Chateau Lakhpat and le Prison Central de Karachi. Eventuallement, I have settled in the Palais Presidentiale en Islamabad. It is a modest abode dans le nouveau Moghul style, only slightly plus opulent than the Elysee Palace. Some enemies of the Republic say that this too is a prison. Time will tell.

Do come and visit us s’il vous plait. Please bring the Sultana of Brunei with you. You can tell her that Madame Jolie, the Sultana of Hollywood was here. She was entertained royalment by the Premier Minister Guilliani. He is mon cher ami and an entertaineur par excellence.

Les populace ici are very fond of all things French. En particuleur, les euros via Le Banc Luxmebourg and les dollars via Le Citibank, Dubai. Aussi, the affinité for la Revolution francaise has grown tremendously. Les masses are agitating in the streets for a French revolution. Please can you spare en peu de la revolution and send it to Pakistan? This will be seen as a great act of amitié by the people of the Islamic Republic from the Fifth Republic. We have already prepared the ground by introducing la Terreur and les decapitations on a large scale.

Rarement in the history of the Republique Islamique, have les populace been so excited. The comité parlimentaire, headed by Monsieur Frere Altaf (currently on French leave in Angleterre), has carefully examined the Russian, the American, the Chinese and the Iranian options and has settled on the French one in the supreme national interest. He has the full support of Field Marshal AP Bonaparte in this endeavour. Vive la revolution.

L’admiral Brother Mansoor ul Haq has flown the coop. Some say he has slipped through the net. Fairplay to Brother Mansoor. We should not begrudge him his Green Card. We should count our own dix pour cent. We should get a good accountant. We should get good legal advice. We should shoot down the pigeons coming home to roost.

I agree mon frère that uneasy lies the head that wears the crown. There are beaucoup des hazards that face world statesmen like us. The world is full of pestilential diseases like dengué and pestilential lawyers like Monsieur Chaudhré and Monsieur Trevedic. But we must persevere in face of adversité. We must fight to keep our immunité. May God keep you safe from your enemies. May God keep Adi Carla safe from her enemies and her friends.

Your Frère in Islamabad,

Le President de la Republique Islamique


PS: I must thank for your hospitalité during the flood season. Please let me know how I can return the favour. If you would like a bomb dans le camion for Monsieur Trévedic, please let me know.

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