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Through Praper Channel

Extraordinary Rendition

By: Hakim Hazik

To whom it may or may not concern,

Through praper channel,

(Including Geo, ARY and Aaj TV channel)


Respected Keem Hazik Sahib,


Dear Sir Ji,

Most respectfully, I beg to satate,  that I ofen read your anal ices. My view pint on nashnal issues is same to same, but there are some impatant differences, which are listed underneath in a number wise fashion.

1.     Savranity: I gree that we are a savran nation. I gree that drone tacks vilate our savranity, but beggars can’t be maternal uncles of savranity. If we go to Mreeka to beg money, every first of the month, so that we can buy tooth paste, we should nat go to them the next day with bootha held high and start shouting mother sister. Instead we should make plans to buy nice nice things fram the IMF money, such as wide screen TV, so that you can every bady can watch, when I come on live TV and present my anal ices.

2.     Swat: I think so that Mlana Soofi Mumd is a village Mullah. We gave him too much impatance. We should have given more impatance to nashnal leaders like me. If he was ejucated in Inglush, like me, he would nat be making such wrang wrang satatemnts against damo cracy, constitution and supreme coat. Instead, he would be the secty journal of the biggest plitical paty in the country.

3.     Information Secty: I do nat gree that Fauzia Wab has the IQ of a pigeon. This is nat fair to her or to the pigeons. She tries her best. She is layal to the paty. She is layal to the Shriek Chairman. She fallows paty disciplun. Therefore she has my full spoat. I will teach her haoo to master media tech neeks. I have recmmended that when we expand the cabinet next time, she will be our 173rd minister. 

4.     Canmy: I gree that the canmy is in distress. If we want to redoos extremism, we have to improve canmy. We should try and develp expoats by permoting our nashnal assets. These include Qulfis from Pani Ala Talab, Baqar Khanis from Chota Mufti Baqar, Lassi fram Kashmiri Bzar and Kababs fram Mochi Draza.  We should also expoat Mlana Soofi Mumd, Mlana Fazlullah, Chory Tzazessun and Salman Tseer. This will bring faran kschange, with which we can feed our masses and our pigeons and buy wide screen TVs for ejucational purposes. 

5.     IRI Poll: Such polls come and go. Shriek Chairman does not take any notus. He is cool in his bady parts. What matters is prasperity. What matters is securety. What matters is bizness. What matters is safe assets, either under the mattress or in Geneva. What really matters is Sheed leaders in heaven and peace in the land.  

Please forgive all said and heard,

Yours truly,

Mumd Jungeer Badar 

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