Hakim Hazik

Extraordinary Rendition

Dar Sahib came knocking on the door, a kashkol (1.5m x 1.5m) in hand, begging for a 1 per cent increase. I have told him to go away. The court will not be moved by the considerations of economics or economic literacy or control of inflation. It only wants justice for the sprawling and miserable humanity, including Arsalan Beta.

He had the temerity to go to the parliament and get it approved retrospectively. The court takes a dim view of these underhand methods to defy the norms of justice, unless of course if it is a coup, conducted in the best interests of the nation and to avoid corruption. In those circumstances, retrospective approval may be granted, but the coup maker will have to apply to this court on the basis of a properly constituted PCO, through proper channel, and the court will arrive at its own independent conclusion, following the legal tradition set by Hazrat Umar. 

It is clear as to all students of law that not all PCOs are alike. Some qualify for approval and acceptance by the highest legal authorities and the beneficiaries will go on to become stars in the firmament of national endeavour. Others will be struck down ruthlessly and the petty minions of the conspiring masters will be sent home with a resounding kick on the backside by the august court inspired by the highest regard for the constitution and democracy. 

It should also be clear that not all generals are alike. A distinction has to be made in the national interest between those who are in service and thus occupy a special status in the consciousness of the nation and those who are retired and can no longer hold a gun to your head. 

The former do not have to appear in person to account for their nation building activities in Khuzdar, but can send their batman with their footwear for the court to clean and return in good order. The latter will face the full force of the law, till they can exit to Jeddah on a special aircraft, flown in by Prince Muqrin. 

Gone are the days when any adventurer could walk in and have his way with the national institutions. We will not allow jumped up politicians to cite obscure laws approved by the colonial British in 1931 to implement financial witchcraft, for the mere reason that they have been elected through an election. They will have to work for the pleasure of the court. We are the guardians of public interest and answerable to ourselves and to the roulette machine in Monte Carlo.  

Not like Dar Sahib, who is only answerable to mandarins in Geneva who ask for the reduction of deficit to four per cent, imposition of VAT, reducing subsidies and ending financial loss in public sector corporations. He thinks he is running a government. He is hugely mistaken. We are running the government, the judiciary the legislature and everything that moves except, of course the GHQ who are allowed to run themselves.

Down, down with the IMF.