Extraordinary Rendition

Hakim Hazik

The International Sensitive Agency takes strong exception to the baseless allegations leveled against it. The Agency has sworn to protect the country and the constitution. The agency has spent blood and treasure answering the call of duty. 

The battle however is not over yet. In fact, it has just been joined. The agency believes in peaceful co-existence. This basic rule of civlised behaviour has been violated with impunity by the bloody civilians. But let there be no doubt. Any violation of our sovereignty will be met with the full force of our sensitivity. We shall fight on land, we shall fight in the air and sea. We shall fight in the officers mess and we shall fight in the Royal Palm Golf and Country Club. (Special rates for Eid and Christmas). We shall rehire the retired and send into the exile the ones we cannot hang.

We must fight this war. The war against the chicanery of the bloody civilians, never surpassed in the dark and lamentable catalogue of human crime.  

Who could have thought that the so called standard bearers of democracy and freedom of expression could stoop so low that they could start blaming the Sensitive Agency for the behaviour of the disappeared people who have disappeared of their own accord in the best tradition of Allama Houdini, (May Allah SWT have mercy on him.) The agency can not bring them back nor can it bring back Syed Salim Shahzad, who chose to go fishing in his Sunday best, not realising that it offers no protection against the dangers lurking in the Upper Jhelum Canal. 

No professional would use a TT pistol to kill a journalist. That would be an insult and a slur on the honour of the agency. One uses TT shots to communicate in a civilised an sober fashion that their may be a difference of opinion. Among nations of the world, these differences are not solved by vicious and vituperative attacks on the media but by gentle negotiations over a cup of tea at the Afghan desk, mediated by Major (Retd.) Aamir and Professor Ibrahim (May Allah elevate their status).

Ladies and gentlemen, you ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: victory; victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be; for without victory, there is no survival. Let that be realized; no survival for the Aabpara, no survival for all that the Aabpara has stood for, no survival for the urge and impulse of the ages, that Askari Housing Society will move forward towards its goal. 

But I take up my task with buoyancy and hope. I feel sure that our cause will not be suffered to fail among men. At this time I feel entitled to claim the aid of PEMRA, and I say, ‘Come then, let us go forward together with our united strength.’ 

Victory is ours. Nobody can stop us. 

You have to apply quickly as the ballot in the Phase 9-10 is just starting.

Your Sensitively,

General ZI

International Sensitive Agency